Infertility counseling at a glance
Infertility is inherently stressful, affecting the well-being of almost every patient receiving the diagnosis or involved in treatments.
Counseling can greatly help people trying to deal with how infertility affects themselves, their partner, their marriage and their lives.
It is completely normal for couples and individuals to need psychological support after a diagnosis of infertility, and professional counseling is often the best way to get it.
We refer our patients to professional infertility counselors, because they have the training, skills and experience to deal with mental health concerns in the most effective way.
The stress of infertility
It can be emotionally devastating to receive a diagnosis of infertility. Many feel a sense of loss and inadequacy after learning their road to parenthood will not be the one they expected. Dealing with infertility treatment can also bring new stresses, as couples swing between emotions of hope and despair.
Add the destabilizing effect of hormone treatments into the mix and the emotional whirlwind can be debilitating. If success doesn’t come soon, stress builds. It’s not uncommon for the second year of pursuing treatments to be even harder on a couple or person than the initial diagnosis of infertility.
Anger, depression, anxiety, fear, grief and other emotions are the natural byproducts of infertility and its treatments. If the cause is known to be due to one partner, it can cause shame in one and resentment in the other. Finding no cause for the infertility isn’t any better.
Deciding on the type of treatment can cause friction and psychological problems. One partner may want to go slowly, the other full speed ahead with in vitro fertilization (IVF).
How to tell if you need counseling
If a person or couple can’t break through their emotional distress with their own efforts and support system, they need professional counseling. In fact, it’s often wise to seek such support before psychological issues get out of control. Counseling can prevent these issues from the start, as well as address them at certain problematic points. For example, right before beginning IVF, many couples are at a low emotional point and need help.
Depression is a very common effect of infertility and its treatments, particularly for women. Deeper levels of depression can prevent one from even acknowledging a problem. This is why a partner needs to be very attuned to his or her mate, and take measures quickly. But that may not be enough, well intended as it is.
Following are indications that professional counseling is in order.
Not functioning normally in daily routine or work
Relationship with spouse and/or others under serious strain
Continual sadness, pessimism or guilt
Plummeting self-esteem
Isolating oneself from others
Loss of interest in favorite activities
Problems making decisions or meeting commitments
Increasing feelings of anger or anxiety
Considering suicide
Frequent crying about infertility
Change in weight, appetite or sleep
If a person or couple has any of the symptoms above and they do not go away, he, she or they should seek professional counseling. Same goes for if a person notices such signs in his or her partner. Patients should always tell their infertility specialist – or a staff member or nurse – about such concerns.
Even finally being pregnant can be loaded with stress and thoughts like, What if there’s a miscarriage? Could I could through all this again? I can’t fail.
Because of all these factors, infertility patients must get the emotional support they need any way they can. Partners must help each other, as can family members and friends.
